We need to talk. It’s been almost 7.5 years since we started seeing each other, and I don’t think it’s working out anymore. I’d like to say it’s not you, it’s me, but that’s just not entirely true. We’ve both changed so much since we first got together and, though change is good, I’m just not sure we’re on the same page anymore.
I remember the early days, when we first started seeing each other. I was a University student and you’d only been around for a couple of years (I had to have an approved university email address to sign up for you). As it was a number of my friends had already signed up for you by the time I finally decided to check you out. We didn’t really click right away, but it was nice getting to know you in those early days. You were so simple compared to now. I was able to write on my friends’ walls and tell people what I was doing (so long as it could be written in sentence that began with “Meaghan is…”). If I had a bit more to say, I could write a “note.” You helped me connect with and stay in touch with some great people!
And then slowly you started to get more and more popular. Don’t get me wrong, that was a good thing for you. It was so much fun connecting with people I hadn’t seen in years! There are people I am connected with today that I may never have reconnected with if it wasn’t for you. Admittedly, there were times when that same feature was a bit awkward (Did that person really just send me a friend request… they didn’t even like me in school… in fact, I seem to remember they could be kind of mean… did they just add me so they could boost their friend count?)
You have some great qualities and we have had some great times. I love that you’ve helped me stay connected to my friends who have moved far away. I’ve enjoyed seeing pictures of my friends weddings and babies and cats and dogs (and everything else in between). I’ve had fun coming up with (what I thought were) witty and funny status updates. I’ve enjoyed reading other people’s status updates. (Not to mention those times you’ve helped me casually find out more about that cute boy from class…) You really do allow for a good deal of positive interaction.
So, why am I breaking up with you if you’re so great? Believe me that is a question I have been asking myself for a while now. Ever since I started thinking about walking away. I want to spend more time connecting with the real people in my life. I know, I know, that is your purpose, but it’s not the same. Reading someone’s status updates throughout the week is not the same as sitting down and talking to them. It’s not the same as a phone call or a text conversation or an email. Maybe I’ll have to settle for connecting with less people, or with people less often. But maybe… just maybe… those connections will be more meaningful more often.
I also want to spend more time writing – really writing. I can’t help but think that if I eliminated all of those “quick” pops over to see you during the day I could get more writing done. Maybe I’ll just transfer time spent on you to time spent on another website. But maybe sometimes I’ll spend that time writing a new blog post, or working on a story… If I can do that, I think it’ll be worth it.
Am I going to miss you? Yes, I probably will. I’ll miss the way you let me quickly catch up with people. I’ll miss the joy of discovery when a friends posts a link to a song they’ve just found. Most of all I’ll miss the updates from my friends who now live far away… that’s probably what’s kept me around for so long. But people managed to stay in touch with long distance friends before you came along and I’m confident I can find a way to make it work.
7.5 years is a long time. It’s strange to think about what life will be like after we break up. I’m sure there will be days when I regret my decision, when I want to come crawling back so I can get in my daily dose of mindless scrolling. I know if I were to decide to come back you would welcome me back with open arms. You might even tell me that you missed me while I was away. But the thing is – you won’t. I’m going to leave tomorrow and you won’t miss me. You won’t even realize I’ve gone. You’ve got millions of other friends that you see every day.
Though we can’t stay friends, I think we can part amicably.
To all of my dear Facebook friends. I truly have enjoyed being part of your lives through Facebook and my hope is we will stay connected, it’ll just look different. I’m not trying to discount Facebook as a method of communication or as a place to hang out – I know it is enjoyed and well used by many. I’ve just decided it isn’t for me anymore. Please follow me over here on my blog (My blog Facebook page will remain active for the foreseeable future). And please – connect with me in real life! (For those who I am not lucky enough to see on a regular basis I hope we’ve already exchanged contact information whether that be email, phone or Skype). I will miss “liking” all of your photos, videos and status updates – and know that if I start “liking” and giving things a thumbs up in real life, it’s probably just a symptom of quitting Facebook cold turkey. (If you had seen the number of times I clicked over to Facebook during the writing of this post you would seriously question my commitment to leaving). M.E.F.